Nè Creator nè creatura fu senz' amore - Neither creator nor creature was ever without love.
Today, I said goobye to my dog of eight years. Needlesss to say, it was a hard day. She was very sick and so I believe that now she is in a much better place and free of pain.
My dogs are part of my family. Her and I shared a very special connection. She came along at a time in my life when I felt very alone and just needed someone who wouldn't judge me and who would love me despite my flaws. Vlooi was that someone.
Every now and again, someone appears in our lives for a specific purpose, whether it be to guide us, love us or simply just live life with us. Vlooi did all of those things for me. In return, I gave her as much kindness, love and understanding as I am capable.
It may sound strange to some, for me to say all these things about a dog, but if you have a pet of any kind, you should understand the bond that some people form with their companions. I won't explain why I'm so heartbroken, if you don't get it, I can't help that. If you do, then I hope you get the chance to say goodbye to any loved one before they pass. Vlooi waited through the night and into the morning for me to say goodbye and I will be forever grateful for that.
I found this quite heartbreaking but helpful at the same time;
My sister and brother-in-law went with her to the vet this morning and they said that when they went in the whole building was silent, no music, nothing. They went in with the vet and found out what was wrong with her. We made the call that she shouldn't be made to suffer with a cancerous tumour, renal failure and arthritis. Before she could even be euthenized she breathed her last breath, obviously ready to go. She passed peacefully, on her own, with family nearby. When my sister and brother-in-law left the vet's room, the song Chasing Cars by Snow Patrol was playing loudly in the reception. It broke my heart, because that song sums up my last moments with her (lying with her on the floor, holding her and just shutting everything out) as well as our eight years together. You could say it was ou 'thing' to sit together on the floor and just be in each other's company.
Anyway, you might think I'm dramatic and that's alright.
[I'll miss our companionable silences that weren't silent at all. I'll miss the peace you gave me with your unshakable calm. I'll miss your unconditional love that none but you could give. Most of all, I miss you and I love you and I thank you from the bottom of my heart for what you gave me and what you let me give. ]